how my gambling started

hey how you all doing? My name is Mike, i'm 28 years old, i come from a family where my father likes to gamble bigtime, and in the past loved his alcohol, and my mother is a small gambler. they got divorced when i was wicked young.
I have come to terms now that i may need some help. Over the past 5 years, i have had small urges to gamble, like on cards, poker, it didnt get serious till like recently, i started to watch and bet on the horses.

It all started when, believe it or not, i was just browsing around the tv with the remote controller and found a tv station called TVG. I started watching it and started to learn everything about it, the different types of wagering, how much money I could Win if i hit big on some Its just, i guess, the urge to want to win a big lump sum of money so my family and i will be all set for a long period of time. Meanwhile, trying to win, all i've been doing is loosing, Not knowing how much money i deposited in total to my gambling account, i check my bank site and realized that i blew through 100 or 200 in just ONE day. In total, i think i lost like approx btwn $5,000 - $10,000, in 2 years. I now think of how much of a dope i was, all i could have done with that money, the things i could have bought with it, but nope, i cannot. i feel wicked low right now. I do currently have a fiancee that ive had fights about gambling, knowing all to well she was right about everything. She has threatened to leave me over it, thank god she hasnt yet. Shes a trooper, i love her, And i'm afraid if i continue, she will leave me.

Well, ive been clean of this for roughly 30 hours, and i want this to continue. i know its not long, but its a start. i want to STOP gambling permanently. I Need some help, ideas, i need ANYTHING that'll help me STOP gambling permanently.

Thank you for reading.....Mike